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How to move forward in difficult times?
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Each day is one great inspiration. Reading, listening, watching, you can find something that will interest you, catch your attention. Yesterday’s conversation with one of my friends made me think about how to deal with even the greatest crisis in life, how to go through it, what can help …
I once saw a picture that quoted the words from Elena Mikhalkova’s book “The Room Of Ancient Keys”:
“In difficult times, you move forward in small steps.
Do what you have to do, but little by little.
Don’t think about the future, or what may happen tomorrow.
Wash the dishes.
Remove the dust.
Write a letter.
Make a soup.
You see?
You are advancing step by step.
Take a step and stop.
Rest a little.
Praise yourself.
Take another step.
Then another.
You won’t notice, but your steps will grow more and more.
And the time will come when you can think about the future without crying.”
In everyday life, mostly in difficult moments, it’s very important to notice that you have done something and to do it very consciously, to appreciate yourself. To make a plan and with joy and satisfaction cross out what you have achieved. As in Tiny Habits – celebrate. It may seem funny, but in this way, we change our thinking and attitude. As BJ Fogg writes in his book “Tiny habits. The small changes that change everything”: “When you celebrate effectively, you tap into the reward circuitry of your brain. By feeling good at the right moment, you cause your brain to recognize and encode the sequence of behaviours you just performed”.
If someone asks you: and what are you happy about? That you washed the floor off? Answer: Yes, exactly! I am proud that I did it today, that I followed the plan, that I took a step forward. Such small steps activate the mechanism of making new ones, increase our motivation, cause the release of happiness hormones and thus improve our mood.
Victor E. Frankl, Austrian psychiatrist and psychotherapist, creator of logotherapy, survived in the Nazi camp thanks to finding the meaning in that reality: meaning of relationship (he wanted to reunite with his wife, whom he had recently married), meaning of work (willingness to continue his profession) and meaning of life (respect for life that leads to God). He wrote in his book: “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves”. To go through a difficult moment, you need to find the meaning of it. I’m sure you know stories of people who survived in difficult conditions like wars, poverty, family crises, work-related breakdowns, personal problems, depression, etc. They went through thanks to the fact that they “based” that moment on something, on their value, on a person, on taking small steps.
Sometimes we have days when we just don’t believe in ourselves, in others, in the world. When we just have no idea how we’ll survive the moment. Sometimes even our body refuses – we don’t want to get up, we don’t have the strength to get up. But just then we all need these tiny steps. Sometimes the right leg, sometimes the left leg or hand to move forward, to move forward despite the difficulties. And it isn’t about not living this moment at all. Yes, to experience it, to feel it, to be aware of it, but not to stay in this hole in life, just to get out of it.
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